Christian Living

How Many Friends Do You Have?

October 14, 2014


How many friends do you have?  Before you check your list on some social media page, let me rephrase the question: How many real friends do you have?  The list probably just got smaller.  Before you finalize those numbers, let’s try one more question: How many real friends do you have that consider you a friend?

That list of thousands probably shrunk to a handful of names.  The number of authentic friends that you have is in direct relation to the number of people you are a friend to.  Or, as the writer of Proverbs put it, “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother” (Proverbs 18:24).

“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people” said Dale Carnegie, “than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”  To be a friend, one must be invested and interested in the other person.  You must have a legitimate concern for what is going on in their life.  Here are five ways to improve your friendship skills.


1. Keep their Names on Your Prayer List.

Friends pray for friends.  Pray for them and pray with them.  Pray specifically, pray daily.  If they are Christians you both have a mutual friend in Christ.  Keep Christ in the relationship by keeping them on your prayer list.

2. Send them a Note of Encouragement.

Everyone is going through something.  Sometimes minor, oftentimes major.  Let them know you care about them.  Write a letter, put a stamp on it and send it in the mail.

3. Let them Know You Appreciate their Friendship.

We take others for granted, especially friendships that have been cultivated through the years.  Let them know you are thankful for their investment in your life.

4. Evaluate your Relationship with Them.

Too often friendships can be one-sided.  Ask yourself a question “Is my relationship with this particular person selfish or greedy?”  Do you only talk about your problems, your needs?  Stop and really ask yourself if you are being a true “friend” to your “friend.”

5. Just Be There.

True friendship is natural.  It is not forced or coerced.  And sometimes the best thing you can do for others is simply being there in their time of need.  Time is friendship’s greatest friend.

Today would be a great day to review your friend list.  Ask yourself if you are their acquaintance or their friend.  Are you there for them during hard times?  Do you call their name to the Lord?  Do you only contact them when you need something?  Is your relationship built upon selfish motives?  Are you on their list of friends?  If not, work at being the kind of friend to them that you would want them to be to you.


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